Saturday, November 21, 2009

I'm ok...

...but I'm really REALLY stressed out. Work is a non-stop treadmill and the pile of work is not getting smaller. Plus I'm suddenly really worried about the economy...we are not having our traditional firm Xmas party at night with family invited -- instead we're having a lunch with just the people who work at the firm. I'm also feeling like we might not get a Xmas bonus (which will be the first time that has happened in my 16 years there). This is scary mostly because no matter how indispensable I think I am, I'm not. No one is. We've already had lay-offs...and I'm under no illusions that the attorneys can't do my job if necessary...even though they don't want to. My only consolation is that I am SO busy...they must need me. Right? ;-)

Maybe it's hormonal, but I've had the stressed out weepies all week.

There are a few good things going on though:

I am still maintaining in a 2-pound range...about 4 pounds up from my lowest right before NYC. Doing things like eating movie theatre popcorn last night at Pirate Radio (thanks, DB!) is not making that scale go down any faster.

HOWEVER, I have been to yoga three times this week!! Yay! I need it right now more for my mind and spirit than for my body...but my body is getting the benefits too. Without this I would have REALLY lost it this week.

I realized on our plane trip to NYC that I just couldn't breathe myself out of my flying anxiety the way I used to when I was practicing yoga regularly. THAT, more than anything, got me realizing that I had to drag my ass back to the mat. Breathing the way that is healing takes practice...that's why they call it a yoga PRACTICE!

I love this new studio. I love the teacher who teaches every night. She never teaches the same class twice (according to her) and that is the way I like it. I know some people like the comfort of doing the same thing all the time and I do see the meditative benefit to that but, to me, there is no challenge when you are just doing the SAME thing every time. The classes are totally my cup of tea and they are (generally) small -- with more than 12 people the studio is jammed and the most I've had in a class so far is 6 (today).

It is great to be able to walk to yoga (good little warm-up) and home afterwards. I am loving this so much...and am grateful to the universe for somehow putting this in my path just when I needed it most. :-)

Just cleared the larger size pants from my closet and am dropping them off at Goodwill on my way to Thanksgiving grocery shop...there's no going back now!


Cindy...154 said...

Being busy is a good sign Before my old job began to go away my boss started talking about how we were not busy. When you worry, just think of me. I lost the job, got a better one and am getting double pay through January. Good things happen. My daughter went to yoga Thursday night at our gym. I want to go, too. I think it would do both of us so much good so I am glad you are posting about it. I love that you can walk there, too. I want places I can walk or bike to. I got rid of my bigger pants so that the largest size in my closet is a 10. I did this so I would not go back. And so far so good. Hang in there and yoga your way to bliss!!

Vickie said...

undergrown pants is a great feeling. And I agree - very empowering to get rid of the undgrown stuff - immediately.

I was new pants shopping myself over the weekend - will be a posting coming up in a week or so (I ended up ordering a wide variety from Landsend, will try and then send back what didn't work).

Vickie said...

have a happy T-day!!!