Down 1...

...but I still feel like I'm up two, down one, up one, down two. :-( I also am having some digestive troubles...again. I'm still feeling like every time I get some momentum something happens to make me lose it. Sigh. But I'm still trying. And my mom told me yesterday that I really look like I've lost weight (I haven't seen her in more than a month, I guess).

We went to the ortho this morning and my mom has two chips off her elbow and the cracked wrist. She's in a splint and wrap from her shoulder to wrist for at least a week, then will have a cast on her wrist for a month. I don't know how she'll be able to shower. I suggested that she come and stay with me for a while, but she's happy at her place...so that means I'll probably be doing a lot more driving than usual (she's about 1/2 from me and an hour from my office).

I hope I get some rest this weekend...yesterday took it out of me...

What a day...

Just home after hours in ER then settling my mom in...she fell after getting off the elevator at her place and then took ambulance to hospital. She now has a beautiful purple and red left side of her face, chip off her left elbow and a crack in her left wrist. She had a CT scan of her brain and they did find she still has one! Also Xrays of her left cheek -- bone not broken, but probably some blood in the sinus (they see fluid in there). Meds have toned the pain down. We hope to see an orthopedic guy tomorrow (she can't get a real cast until the swelling goes down). Not great for me having to miss work after so much lately with my own sickiness, but fortunately things seem like they were slow today after I had to get out of there.

It's hard when our parents start getting more brittle...I'm bushed...didn't make the gym tonight and my knee is the worse for it. :-(

If it's not one thing...

...it's my mother! Just got a call a little while ago from her senior complex -- she's had a bad fall and is in an ambulance on the way to the hospital! I talked with her and she sounds ok, but apparently tripped over some carpet installers something-or-other and has a black eye, bloody nose, hurt arm (she hurt it when she fell out of town last week) and hurt leg. They are taking her for Xrays. I will have to leave work in a little while to go get her (the hospital is probably about an hour from here) and get her home and settled. She's got neuromas in her feet and can't feel much in them so this has been just waiting to happen as she gets older (she's 77). She's very resilient though, so I hope she hasn't broken anything.

The second thought that came to my mind when I got this call was: I'd better be able to make it to the gym tonight!! If it's not one thing... ;-) I think I will make it...although I probably won't make it back to work depending on when they let her out of the hospital (assuming they DO).

Not sure how weigh-in will be tomorrow. I have been very good this week with eating and back to the gym on Tuesday. If there is justice in the world, the scale will be going down again. It's actually amazing to me that I am doing as well as I am with the eating and drinking -- I feel pretty stressed about my house not getting any offers yet and not finding a place for use to buy either (I guess that last part is actually a good thing!). I really need to be in a house SOMEWHERE by August since my family from NYC is coming to visit then. I have guests coming in May too, but they have been forewarned that I may (will hopefully) be in the midst of moving. Send good real estate thoughts please! :-)

I'm baaaack

Well...almost! I still have a deep and loose cough and my ears seem to get stuffed up at least once a day, but I am back at work, back at the gym (as of tonight) and back to feeling like I have at least a little control over my body! This bug is just incredibly tenacious...I know some people have been relapsing on it for a few months. I really really want it GONE.

In spite of this, I managed to go see some houses this weekend (still nothing that we can afford that we really like), move more stuff out of my house into storage (so the house looks REALLY good now), and have dinner on Saturday and Sunday nights with some of our very good friends! I am SO ready to have the house sold and get a new place...although I'm happy to have had this springtime in this house: the wisteria is blooming, the fig tree is leaf-ing and it's just beautiful in my garden. I'm appreciating every minute I have in this house...and I'm also ready to move on. :-)

It's good to have DB back from Nearby Town too...yeah, THAT's the real happy news. :-)

Now I just have to get totally BETTER. Thanks for all your good wishes and ideas...it really means a lot. :-)

Still sick...

...and the weigh-in today made me even sicker. Up 2 pounds. Not surprising since I couldn't exercise all week and just laid in bed and ate soup. At least I watched the sodium this time so the gain wasn't as bad. Just when I think I'm getting some momentum on losing, something like this sickness relapse happens. Very depressing. :-(

I'm going to the doctor this afternoon -- this bug is living in my chest and ears and it's not getting better at all. I think I need drugs. I hate taking them, but I hate being sick more right now.

Feeling very "poor me" today.

The best news of the week though is that I celebrated my 4th "birthday" on Wednesday -- 4 years of not smoking! :-) Wonderful DB sent me beautiful flowers and a note (he always remembers even though he never knew me when I smoked) to celebrate. :-)

Sick again...

...damn! Trying to avoid sodium-filled soup (which is HARD) and not gain due to no exercise tonight. Going to bed...craving HEALTH. :-(

Monday Monday

I could have used at least another day of weekend!! The weekend was as busy as I expected and I am back at work today with a bad cough. The good news is that all that moving of boxes, etc. MUST have been good exercise and I went to the gym too! I also was good with food -- no time to think about eating more than a "regular" person. So, with the exception of the cough, I'm feeling good today...

I was going to go to yoga class tonight because one of my favorite teachers who rarely teaches anything but privates (pricey) is subbing at a studio tonight. But I think I'd better stay home and get rid of this cough. I have another busy week ahead and can't be sick!

The house looks really good now -- most everything I don't need for a few months is now in storage. Hopefully this will mean we'll get some offers after the open house next Sunday...or even before. We still haven't found that perfect house for us, but there are several possibilities -- including selling my house and renting for a while in hopes that the market drops even more so we get a REALLY good deal. I am not so sure this is a great strategy though -- houses at the beach really don't lose value and one of our requirements is that our new place has to be within 2 blocks of the beach! Easier said than done...so far!

UP 1, but not too depressed

I'm actually relieved. I have been BAD the past two nights by drinking wine (the real estate day yesterday was my excuse to "lose it" last night) and last night I didn't even go to the gym because we were going to see a potential house. It's also TTOM so I could put on a pound (or more) just from that!! So I'll be happy and be a better girl next week. :-)

This weekend I have to pack up a LOT of stuff in my house and get it to storage because we have a "hot prospect" coming to see the house and my (yes, still moronic) realtor wants as much stuff out as possible. It will be a busy weekend for me since DB will be up in Nearby Town taking care of his parents starting tomorrow so I'll be on my own! The good thing is that I just moved (and scaled down) two years ago AND this means I'll be 1/2 packed for our ultimate move...hopefully SOON!

Today is Valentine Do-Over for DB and me (to make up for VD when I was so sick at my stomach that I couldn't eat and also got the third-degree burn on my arm!). I'll be cooking the same special dinner and we've been wishing each other Happy Valentine's Day all day. He's the best playmate. ;-)

Happy Valentine Do-Over everyone!

It's not easy being a supermodel ;-)

Yup, I had my "before" photo shoot this morning...early...and, let me tell you, I now realize that being a supermodel is not all about coffee and cigarettes (neither of which I use anymore)!! ;-) It actually was fun...I went in, signed paperwork, got the products, took off my top, put on a terry strapless thing (they wanted to see my spotty chest) and then the shoot started. It was kind of disconcerting having them pour over every single photo before moving to the next...and there I was with NO MAKE-UP. Yikes. It was really kind of hard to keep the exact same pose while they looked at the last photo, decided what to do next, etc. I felt like really just a thing, not a person. Poor real supermodels! ;-)

The lighting was so nice in the studio though that I didn't look as much like an ogre as I was afraid I would (but I won't be getting professional photos of myself with NO MAKE-UP any time soon!!). The sideview photos were actually kinda nice. It was funny to have the producer fussing over my hair (which was just in a ponytail) with me there with NO MAKE-UP!! ;-) The hand shots were harder...since I was the first supermodel of the morning, they had to actually figure out how to do them with me as the guinea pig. It required a little contorting. ;-)

Anyway...it was fun...cross your fingers that the product gets rid of my spots (although, to be honest, the other women who were there asked me why I was because I "don't have any spots"...next to them, they were right, but it sure shows how spots are in the eye of the beholder).

We lost a townhome that I really liked today because our MORONIC realtor (who, unfortunately, is also a friend so I can't rip him a new one) didn't call the realtor for that property to just let him know we were interested. So they accepted another offer and we didn't even have a chance to overbid. I asked our realtor to call the guy LAST MONTH. I am furious. But trying to not dwell on it...

It's not easy being a superwoman. :-)

Cruising along

Whew...the weekend was busy and I'm just NOW getting over it! :-)

Saw Devil Wears Prada on Friday night -- liked it, but was very very very cranky with Netflix -- about 5 minutes of the climax on the DVD didn't work! I am still not sure exactly what happened. So I whipped off a note to my friends at Netflix telling them that while I am in love with their system that perhaps it is not so fantastic when 30% of the DVDs I've gotten in the past month have had problems like this! Grrrr. They sent me a very nice e-mail back (two days later) and sent out a new DVD without getting any back so I had 4 out for a second there yesterday instead of my usual three. I do so love Netflix, but the quality of the product, not so great right now.

DB came home early Saturday morning and boy was I happy to see that man! Two weeks with no kisses is not so fun...I used to go MONTHS without kisses and I was fine...but I guess I'm addicted now. ;-) We had a quick frittata as I zipped out for a go-see for an infomercial that a friend of mine is producing. It's for some very pricey skin care products and they wanted people with brown age/sun/hormone spots. Well, I have a few of these on my right hand and have had them for over 10 years and I hate them because I think they make me look old. I also have one spot on the side of my face and a million and five on my chest and legs. It was fun to have all these people so HAPPY to see these spots! (It turns out that I did actually get "cast" in the infomercial even though I don't "have enough" ugly spots -- they let my friend put me in anyway!).

After the go-see, I had to pick up a ton of fire wood and grocery shop for some snacks and drinks for the beach bonfire on Saturday night, then went to the gym while our realtor showed my house. After that, I had to jam to get showered and help DB get all our toys (hula hoops, drums, other instruments, incense, fire spinners, blinky lights) packed into our cars to head to the beach. We stopped at Subway for a sandwich on the way down and got there about 6 pm and just barely got the last fire ring at the beach!! Whew!! Of course, the fire ring wasn't where we had told our friends to meet us but, thank goodness for cell phones, we all met up finally.

It was a blast. I hoped to have some better photos to post here, but a couple are above (that's me in my glasses and glowy headband!). After they threw us off the beach a little after 10, we headed over to some friends' house and hung there until LATE. I was very good with food that night...after Subway, I just had low fat chips and a couple of drinks. :-)

Sunday we slept in until almost noon (new time). It was glorious. :-) After that we took it slow...went down to the beach for brunch (I had a veggie wrap and salad with fat free dressing). It was a fantastic, warm, sunny day. We had a walk along the beach, then went to see some properties. In the evening, we had some cocktails in my garden then a small dinner and watched Babel (kind of disappointing to me, but DB loved it). We crashed at 11 (new time). :-)

I'm finding it pretty easy to get back into the swing of very good eating (and no drinking) during weekdays. It feels good to have that discipline. Not that I'm eating/drinking like a total madwoman on the weekends, but it's good to come "home" to being "good" during the week. :-) Last night we went out for sushi though...I've gotta learn to eat it without the (even low sodium) soy sauce...I'm scared of sodium after my experience a couple of weeks ago!

P.S. Thanks to everyone for all your advice on Friday...all is much better now...although this week is (hopefully) TTOM.

Rollercoastering

I love rollercoasters...I love the up and down...I think I have to think of a new word for what is going on with my weight because, while I love the "down", I do NOT love the up. So it's not a rollercoaster for me! Ideas for other metaphors welcome. ;-)

So, drum roll please, I am down 4.6 pounds this week. If that doesn't tell you how important exercise is, nothing will. Last week I was up 1.6 -- I was sick in bed all week and no exercise at all (plus sodium-filled all-soup diet). This week being back on my "regular" good eating and going to the gym just twice, I'm down SO much. And, frankly (I hope I'm not offending any reader's sensibilities here by being honest), I think I would be in even better shape if I wasn't dealing with constipation. (Any ideas on how to deal with this in a long-term healthy way are encouraged -- I'm good when practicing yoga, but am at least 3 months away from being able to do that with my knee. I've tried Metamucil -- makes me nauseous -- and stool softeners -- which work, but I don't like the idea of taking on a long-term basis. I eat tons of salads and veggies and fruit and that's not working. Anyway...)

Do I feel the 4-plus pound "loss" this week? Yes. I definitely feel better (of course I was sick last week, but...). I must try to keep this up next week...DISCIPLINE.

I've got a big weekend ahead -- DB and I are having a much-belated birthday bonfire beach bash tomorrow night. Lots of friends meeting at the beach where they have fire pits and we'll have a fire and some refreshments. I'm looking forward to it very much! Not to mention that DB will be home tomorrow after a week in Nearby Town with his parents -- I haven't had a kiss in almost TWO WEEKS because last week I was sick and we were afraid to send a bug up with him to his frail parents. I miss DB...and those kisses! ;-)

More showings of my house are scheduled too...please send good house-selling energy...I am ready for this to be over. I sympathized with Grumpy's story the other day SO MUCH about the hassle of keeping your house super-neat while trying to sell...and I don't even have two kids! I'm a very neat person to begin with, but when we show, there can be NO dog hair, etc. around and everything has to be as "clean" looking as possible (bearing in mind that I still have to LIVE there). This is so different from when I sold my first house -- we had like one open house and got 6 offers! It was a very different market two years ago...

In so many ways, I'm anxious to get on with the rest of my life! Doing it...day-by-day. :-)

Even better...but confused

So this morning I did something I almost never do: I weighed in during the week. I just had to know that the gain last week was an aberration and...I was down over 4 pounds. This is just silly. Vickie always says she lets herself have a 2 pound leeway because over 2 is when it becomes "real", but I often have these silly fluctuations, so...

I'm confused. I have not done anything this week that I have not been doing (most weeks) since January. Four pounds seems like a lot. Now, I'm happy with it and I don't know if it will last until Friday when I officially weigh-in, but how can a person fluctuate that much? I remember Lori writing that her scale was making her laugh with the low weights it was showing...in my case, I think today's weight is a lot more "real" than the sucky weigh-in last Friday (I'm possibly deluding myself, of course).

Anyway, this whole thing is really confusing me so much because I am doing the same (or better) foodwise and exercisewise than when I lost all my weight back in the mid-90s. This time I have so (relatively) little to lose, but it's incredibly harder. I know I've written about this before, but it's still bugging me.

To make myself feel better, I decided today to look at the bright side: since January 1, I have "lost" (I'll believe it when it stays off and starts going down consistently) 10 pounds. I am not going to count from back in October when I officially started to try to lose weight -- I couldn't exercise really until January due to knee recovery so my possibility of actual continuing weight loss was dim, I think. If I tell myself I really started in January, I feel much better. So play along, will ya? ;-)

Better

This morning is the first one in over a week where I woke up and felt "better". This is a small thing, but HUGELY important for my state of mind. I have been feeling down, depressed and flabby. No exercise for a week will do that to a person! I will be going back to the gym tonight even though I'm not entirely better and I can't wait! :-)

I feel like my life has been crammed for the last months...and a week "off" from life to deal with this sickness has just put me farther behind. Is it too soon to have another vacation? ;-)

Supersize Me

Watching this movie and there's SO much to assimilate. Has anyone else seen this? Wowee. Not sure what I think yet. More later...

Well, I don't think I'll be eating at McDs anytime soon (not that I ever was a big fan)!! It was shocking to see the damage that this guy did by eating poorly for just a month...gained 25 pounds, terrible effects on his blood work, etc. And also how it took him 3 times as long to get the weight off. I am going to try to remember this the next time I think "oh well, I'll just eat bad for a day"...that it might take 3 days to recover. That's the rollercoaster...

Why?

I just weighed and I'm UP (again) 1.6. I am just too bummed about this...particularly because I don't FEEL like I'm up. I haven't been able to exercise this week due to sickness (I'm still sick), but I've been very very good with food -- pretty easy when all you want to do is sleep. I should have at least maintained. DEPRESSING. I guess I'll just have to get back on it next week...when I'm feeling better (which I am not yet). :-(